I remember that when the Soviets were attacking Afghanistan, one of the Russian general’s said that fighting them was very hard because “everytime they looked down our gun barrels, they saw Heaven”. When people reach a level where they are constantly in rememberance of Allah, what they see in this world is no longer the same. Think of Neo in the Matrix. He saw things very differently than everyone else. But in general, I agree with MR, for not everyone can be ‘The One’.

Safiyyah on June 11, 2006 at 12:43 am said:

Salaam,
Historically, it seems men have always been more inclined towards appearance and outward beauty, whereas women are more concerned with a man’s character, financial and employment status, etc. I don’t know whether that remains the case today.
By the way, your final statement on the meaning of beauty seems to contradict the rest of your post.

the last statement was suppose be different from what i mean, becuase i know ppl were gunna say things like “there is inner beauty, and ppl can be attracted to that.”

im jusy saying that, that physical outer beauty attraction has to be there.

In that case you gotta look at other things: character, piety.

I so agree with looking at beauty first(cause for me looks did matter a whole lot).

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!!

Imran Khan on June 8, 2006 at 5:42 pm said:

Dear Mr. Ryder,

At the end of your entry, you use a meaning of beauty that I dont believe we were talking about in our discussion that night.
As far as non-physical types of beauty go, there is no question that people look for and definitely should look for this in a spouse. We all generally want to see our mates as posessors of beautiful character, and this is Deen itself, because at the height of the scale fo beauty is the man who was told “Verily you are of a great morality” Peace be upon him.
This must have happened to some1 else, or maybe many people. You meet someone, and at first you don’t find them attractive, but their actions are so adorable to you that you soon find yourself attracted to them because they do really neat things or have a very beautiful character.
As far as physical beauty goes, we all know that we have been poisoned with ads, magazine covers, billboards and t.v. in many ways, one of which is this extremity in physical looks, and so our standards have gone really high in this department, and for that reason I think we have to kick back a gear or two and realize this already known point when choosing a spouse….also worthy to note that the Prophet Peace Be Upon him was the most beautiful person in terms of beauty, Yusuf, peace be upon him, lived in this world in his full beauty, but Allah only showed a glimpse of the beauty of His Beloved, for if he had shown the whole of it, no eye could bare it…P.S. not everyone can be a “Jessica Alba Sahib”

Dear Mr. Khan,

I know, but some people are attracted to different hings even in physical appearance. Maybe person X may have a big nose, but to persy Y, its a hot nose. That’s what I meant.

Reggae Powered DC2 on June 8, 2006 at 5:34 pm said:

Beauty matters to me, Status and Wealth dont. In some other blog or something, someone wrote we should look at beauty before piety. If the person looks good to us, look at thier deen and then decide and if we dont like the way they look, walk away.

He said if we were to look at their deen and then their beauty, if we find pious women who didnt look good, and walked away, we would be putting beatuy above piety.

Makes some sense.

I think I messed that up?

The person said look at beauty then deen. If the beauty is good, then the deen will be the deciding factor.

But if you choose to look at deen first, and its good, but then the beauty isnt, and you walk away … then you are choosing beauty over deen.

At the end of your entry, you use a meaning of beauty that I dont believe we were talking about in our discussion that night.
As far as non-physical types of beauty go, there is no question that people look for and definitely should look for this in a spouse. We all generally want to see our mates as posessors of beautiful character, and this is Deen itself, because at the height of the scale fo beauty is the man who was told “Verily you are of a great morality” Peace be upon him.
This must have happened to some1 else, or maybe many people. You meet someone, and at first you don’t find them attractive, but their actions are so adorable to you that you soon find yourself attracted to them because they do really neat things or have a very beautiful character.
As far as physical beauty goes, we all know that we have been poisoned with ads, magazine covers, billboards and t.v. in many ways, one of which is this extremity in physical looks, and so our standards have gone really high in this department, and for that reason I think we have to kick back a gear or two and realize this already known point when choosing a spouse….also worthy to note that the Prophet Peace Be Upon him was the most beautiful person in terms of beauty, Yusuf, peace be upon him, lived in this world in his full beauty, but Allah only showed a glimpse of the beauty of His Beloved, for if he had shown the whole of it, no eye could bare it…P.S. not everyone can be a “Jessica Alba Sahib”