I recently participated in a one on one session with a student who just graduated from a life coaching program called discoverulife, started by Shaykh Muhammad AlShareef (founder of AlMaghrib Institute). Basically the brother was giving me a free session on life coaching. I can’t give the details of the session, but I am extremely impressed by the knowledge and the advice that was taken and received. I did some Google research on life coaches and life coaching in general and found out that most (probably all) of all the major Fortune 500, high-tech company CEOs and people of high authority spend millions of dollars a year just to hire a life coach.
When the brother was explaining how life coaching works it reminded me exactly how the murids are with their shaykh in a Sufi tariqah. The murid gives baiyah (allegiance) to the shaykh as a guide to help him on his path. The tariqa is basically the path. The guide or coach is the shaykh. So the shaykh would consult with each of his murids and ask them about their ibadat, their daily adhkar, etc. The same is with the life coach except its more related to achieving your goals in this world. Meaning the life coach will help you attain your goals and aspirations in life and help to organize and utilize all the aspects of your life from family, work, school, hobbies, volunteering, religion, etc.
From what I see in the discoverulife program is that it combines both the religious and materialistic aspect of life and allows the person to attain the changes and goals they want in their lives.
One of the students posted their Five Diamonds from Discover U Certification and for those who are wondering which certified life coach gave me a free session, it was Belal of Leechon. There are several others around the country that are giving away free sessions. It takes about 30-40 minutes and it’s over the phone. I highly recommend giving it a try. I’ve learned a lot in that short phone call with Belal.
Oh yeah, I didn’t give baiyah to Belal, I just took/participated in his free session. No offense Belal, 
.
71 Responses for "Life Coaching is like a Sufi Tariqa: A Structural Comparison"
You’re not the first person to think of this
Awesome. During Certification we discussed how Sufis are all about some psychological techniques.
The thing that differentiates Discover U is that you are never in a trance, less of a ‘tradition’ involved and it’s straightforward, no mystics involved. I am available for a few more free sessions for those who are interested.
I don’t think the FOUNDER of “discoverulife” would agree with the comparison of a life coaching and sufi bands.
@Mostafa – See Riza’s comment above yours.
Also, if you have not been in a Sufi tariqah nor know any murids in any then you wouldn’t see the similarities. From what I have read it reminds me so much of it.
too different
Life coaching removes obstacles from the path you hose
tariqa give you an actual path…
*One of the many things. I should have said.
@Meeee – Okay but Life coaching also checks on your path and asks you if you’ve done what you’ve suppose to. The shaykh of a tariqa does the same thing with his student. As you said the Life coach removes obstacles from the path, a shaykh does the same thing for those who are trying to stay on their path.
Life coaching does not involve bida’h baiyahs. Just because someones intentions are good or good comes from it doesnt mean it isnt innovation. May allah give us all a life coach in one form or the other
Amir opened another can of worms
Plus, in life coaching you don’t *have* to absolutely listen to your life coach no matter what – in a Sufi tariqah, you must listen to your shaykh blindly.
Lol, you and ur sufi’s. Just give bay3ah and you wont need anymore of these “Free 30 minute” life coaching gimmicks, you’ll get the real deal. Make sure no jinn are involved though
@Nihal – Bro, I’m just reflecting. It’s so clear, but people are just blinded by their own reservations of the “sufi tariqah”. They just can’t admit that the life coaching way is similar in so many ways to the sufi tariqa. Of course there are differences, but it’s still similar.
@AbdelRahman – You don’t have to listen to the shaykh either. You think every murid listens to their shaykh? In fact the shaykh usually just gives advice.
I think it’s a great comparison and makes a lot of sense. Another great post ahki!
Br. Riz – How do I contact you for a free session? JazakAllah Khair.
Wow…It’s amazing to see how many people want to distance themselves from something that is rightfully similar in methodology.
the word “sufi” is not the boogey man.
Are we all 2 years old…or just “on the sunnah”. Expand your critical thinking skills.
Bismillah , as salamu alaykum
A good friend of mine in Canada was called by a sister – a life coach trained by Muhammad alShareef – and was harassed. My friend never requested the call but she does a lot of community work and deals with many people so it was to be expected apparently. This ‘life coach’ tried to force her to take sessions by playing word and mind games, playing the guilt game if my friend didn’t accept the session while the special price was still going.
I trust this woman who shared this with me with my life. After she shared that with me and some of Muhammad Al Shareefs little techniques that he tends to use in his class (that she attended and help put together), I did some of my own research. His site is interesting – it reminds me of those sites that are always out to sell something but with the word “Muslim.” Interesting.
It is most definitely a cheap shot at Tazkiyyat an nafs/Ihsan/Tasawwuf. Tasawwuf is as straightforward as it gets. Be it through a shaykh or through the steps that the tariqah gives, it is clear that you either seek Allah in this life or you don’t. It’s also free and it isn’t something that just anyone can do. In order to be a teacher of tasawwuf/Ihsan/Tazkiyyat an nafs you must have gone through the path yourself. I think it is unfair to compare this ‘life coaching’ to Tasawwuf because it is definitely not comparable, but just like any other self help book out there, I’m sure there is benefit in it although I, personally, don’t believe it is a holistic approach. The problem, for me, is when it is done by the same people who reject the turuq and who reject the importance of having someone lead us in cleaning our heart. What’s the difference then and why continue attacks? Maybe they didn’t finish their training.
BismillahirRahmanirRahim.
MR- What’s the motivation in posting this? Are you trying to mollify your spirit into telling it that Wahhabism and Sufism is the same, or are you trying to tell your Wahhabi friends that Sufism is the same as their convoluted attempt at it. The fact of the matter is, both approaches are deceptive. You are either deceiving yourself or others. Those of us who are in Tarikat, though we understand that we are the lowest ones, also understand that there is no way an approach that emanates from the minds of the unbelievers can ever rival the pure knowledge that has passed from the Holy Prophet (AS) to his Companions to the Awliya. How can any of us dare to say that such knowledge is, effectively, the same as something an unbeliever basically dreamed up. We have to wake up. MR, I know you. Stop this nonsense.
@Siddiq – My post has nothing to do with fiqh, the definition of tasawwuf or sufism, its not against salafism or anything of that nature. It is simply a reflection on comparing the structure of a tariqa and a that of life coaching. I am not talking about the spirituality or the barakah or the blessing of the tariqah or anything. I am simply saying the structure is similar. That’s all.
“It’s also free and it isn’t something that just anyone can do. ”
http://www.shadhiliteachings.com/durus/signup.php
Full Membership ($40.00 for one year)
Annual membership to access recorded hadras, qasidas, lessons and the Suhba audio files (dating back to the first 1998 Virginia Suhba). With this subscription you get 2 free credits to download a couple audio files from our new Pay-Per-Download (PPD) section. Full members will be able to purchase additional credits (at a discounted price) to download audio lessons from the PPD section.
that doesnt sound free
@free it isnt
this is
http://www.naksibendi.org
http://www.nakshibendi.com
BismillahirRahmanirRahim
MR, you’re right, you’re not comparing. You’re actually positing life coaching as higher. You state that “The same is with the life coach except its more related to your entire life.” Thus you are saying that Sufism is more limited than life coaching. Having read Shaykh Nuh’s works or sat in a Minara program is not the same as knowing Tasawwuf. Tasawwuf is living the lifestyle of Islam. Life coaching is not
All these certification stuff are revenue extracting mechanism more in line with the stuff peddled by tele-evangelist and new age spiritualist than any orthodox tariqa. DiscoverU got even the style of advertising/promotion replicated
The niche market is middle and upper class Muslims type who can pay for these sorts of seminars. The type of Muslims who are disconnected from much of their rich spiritual traditions of the ascetics and mystics or even shun them. Basically what we have here are generations of Muslims growing up totally unaware and taught to hate and distrust a significant part of their heritage. The heritage that produced highest form of human expression in every field all across the world (poetry, stories, architecture, adab/akhlaq literatures, prose, ethics, aphorisms etc..). These Muslims would have ended up going to events held by non-Muslims. Now it maybe that some people will benefit from it and but that should not stop us from seeing what it really is.– an appropriation and maybe an innovation.
@Siddiqi – Wallahi bro, forgive me if that is what you got. Life coaching is not even close to being a replacement for tasawwuf.
the path isn’t about taking obstacles away from your life so you can be happy, its about walking the path towards the vision of God. it isn’t this nonsense of taking peoples money and making them feel good about themselves. In fact, if you walk the path instead of dabbling in it, you realize its founded upon quite the opposite. It is willingly accepting an ocean of pain for the rest of your life, for it is only the pain that accompanies the realization of our separation from God which allows us to reach Him. this comparison of yours is superficial at best, though there are better words for it which i won’t repeat here. the authentic teachers of the path would never accept money, for they represent those “who ask no wage from you.” Their reward is with God. They are submitted to Him, so they teach only in obedience to His command. And please do not use the internet to show me examples of the teachers of tasawwuf. Provided, many authentic teachers have used the internet as a means for communication, some of the greatest teachers still can’t be found on the internet; traditional sufism didn’t put itself out there because all traditional people know that you don’t throw pearls before swine. They wouldn’t call you towards it, you would have to seek it out, for only then would you be free from the delusion that spiritual attainment is something easy to reach. The spiritual path is not just advice and self-help, its a serious approach towards discovering the very root meaning of what God intended by our existence. And its primary focus is the remembrance of God, its transmission and preservation in the heart, not giving advice or removing obstacles. The fact that these people appear to be mimicking some of the secondary aspects of the path is simply further evidence of the darkness of the times we live in, for the reign of the cursed one which draws near with every passing breath is founded upon this type of superficial imitation of authentic religion. I know that even the greatest of the umma cannot stop such developments, for only in the darkest part of the night will humanity finally realize the brilliance of the light of the sun of God’s guidance. but forget not the words of our Prophet, upon him be peace, when he taught us that if we look upon something which happens and approve of it, it is as if we are of those who did it, and if we are caught up in it but disapprove of it, it is as if we were not amongst those who did it. I disassociate myself with such utterly superficial and frighteningly ominous developments so that on the day of judgement I can hope that my Lord does not associate me with the people of innovation and deviance. As your brother in Islam Amir, I would recommend you to do the same. May those who have ears hear my words, and may our Lord forgive our sins and guide us in the darkness of the night, God is with the patient and God is with the Just.
If you would like to make istinjaa’ of your soul, please do not join a tareeqah or life coaching program. just follow me on twitter (it’s free).
Haha, April Fool’s, very funny.
Siraaj
analogous not synonmous
Man we got some haters up in here and people who think TOO much.
I’ve been offered these life coaching sessions from DiscoverU by a really good brother, but the skeptic in me is really forcing me to hesitate.
My biggest problem is that they ask for money. It’s not like i can’t afford it, but if I were trying to help a brother out with their goals, I don’t think I could look them in the eye and ask for money. It just pollutes the image of sincerity.
That’s my biggest problem with this whole life coaching thing.
I see a lot of Christians selling their religion, with fancy suits, the kind of people Bill Maher makes fun of, like Joel Osteen. I get the same vibe from “Muslim Life Coaches”, even if this organization is run by Shaykh Muhammad AlShareef.
hmmm…..don’t know how to conclude my thoughts……
This DiscoverU thing is like 100 bucks a month. It seems like those dudes who give you free sessions are just using a marketing strategy to sell “How to Accomplish The MOST Out of YOUR life!!!”, and get you hooked after you listen to it.
The thing that bothers me about this is the fact they’re making a business out of improving people’s lives. That to me is as bad as the American healthcare system (yeah, i’m Canadian).
See, once you involve money as a factor in progress of any organization, you automatically exclude people from certain services. Just like in private school, parents with money send kids to private schools to get the best education, and to be in the presence of the smartest kids, then the public school kids do worse, because there aren’t as many smart kids left, making a progressively worse environment for the public school kids.
Just like the school system, and the health care system, money shouldn’t be a boundary that excludes people from the improvement of their lives. This is why I have a problem with “Islamic Copyright”, and the whole business of selling Islam to people.
Just A Thought
Interesting reflection Amir. I’m glad you benefited.
I also find the people’s comments quite interesting as well.
It would be even more interesting to see the reflection of their responses to how they perceive their life in light of the responses that have been given. – Just a thought
Asalaamu Alaykum oh crazy people =P
I understand that it makes you a bit uncomfortable when they ask for money but why does that mean anything about sincerity, do only the sincere ask for money? We must have a ton of insincere hajj guides, Imams and shayookh then.
Money is a commitment factor. (http://www.almaghribworld.com/2009/04/01/five-diamonds-from-discover-u-certification/)
If we couldn’t charge for a beneficial service, then the only services that would exist are non-beneficial.
Actually, Muhammad Alshareef encouraged us to help people out who couldn’t afford it. There are other ways of getting commitment also by the way, not just cash. (http://www.almaghribworld.com/2009/04/01/five-diamonds-from-discover-u-certification/)
If any BROTHERS want more information on coaching, hit me up at Riza.Lifecoach@gmail.com. Tell me a bit about yourself and what interested you coaching.
PS: Discover U is not all about money!
I remember thinking this same thing about a year ago, but I never said it because of what it would cause. There is an emotional and spiritual vaccuum in the lives of many brothers and sisters, and I think that is why this came about. Let’s face it, Muslims are a very confused lot and are desperate for some sort of stability- and so life coaching is clung onto.
I personally did feel it was a way of making more money out of Almaghribies, and taking advantage of them, but hey whatever works for you right?! This is why I am very uncomfortable with the whole money + ilm thing, even with the tariqahs and traditionalists- such a thing was rejected by ALL the early Sufis and Salaf. But it’s hard to get ilm nowadays in the West so we play along… see sidi Yursil’s post as to what the Hanafi madhab says on that: http://www.yursil.com/blog/2008/12/charging-for-teaching-quran-islam-islamic-texts/
Sufism today has it’s own problems, true, but if you search around you will find REAL sufis, and you will know because they will only speak the truth, be able to read your heart even, take only from the Quran and Sunnah and won’t be in it for the money nor the fame. Allah is the one who guides to them, not your dollar bill.
The other thing was that DiscoverU is based on NLP, which is a name you can find side-by-side with the word “Pseudo-Science”. The fact that, “It works” or that “It’s accepted or recognized” doesn’t change much, because, in a democracy anything works- even scientology! In fact, I’ve read NLP books and most of it seems like bunk to me and none of it worked for me. The true stuff is what I’ve already learned in psychology classes, based on academic research papers. Read a book, it’s faster and cheaper!
So I think the question is: why has this come about, where shaykhs and others are operating like this? Charging so much for this? Do they have bad intentions? Or is it something else?
And I think the long and short answer is, everything is far game in a democracy. We have no “Islamic standards” as to how to go about this, what is the adab, etc. so nothing can be quite wrong because you have nothing to compare it too. The same thing applies to “conspiracy theories”–these guys will take some truth and twist it to their own agenda…there are no standards in underground stuff, just as there are none among our community.
This is one situation where nothing could change, unless people develop the awareness and actually have ilm and take the time to read and go beyond. Until then, any accusation will look unfair or biased or not helping. We’re a community that isn’t quite sure what we should do, so we don’t want to hear of another thing that we shouldn’t be doing or approving of…
@ Brother Riza (Wu-tang Clan ain’t nothing to mess with!)
Look, things cost money, I get that. And you have to pay money, whether buying a Quran, going for Hajj, or going for jihad. BUT, improving people’s lives by way of Islamic knowledge or by helping them with their goals shouldn’t be something people sell and market like a business and make a profit from, and it has always bugged me.
There ARE shaykhs out there who spend ridiculous amounts of time guiding people OUTSIDE the time of their daytime jobs. Shaykh Husain Abdul Sattar is a pathologist that graduated from University of Chicago, he works long hours, has kids and a wife, and yet he has an entire class of students who he is teaching a 7 year Alim program in the local masjid for free, outside of his working hours. The only thing the students have to pay for is the books, and even that he is willing to pay for. That’s what I mean by sincerity.
and as for adding value to your commitment with money, you can add infinitely more value to your commitment with a shaykh of tassawauf with Bayah, then with with giving up a couple of hundred bucks.
I just thought I’d mention the Bayyah conept, considering the nature of MR’s article.
but again, as Riza said, and what I hope is true :
“Discover U is not all about money!”
Oh yeah, well I’m at it…MR makes money off of his websites too. You click on this page, or on HT or any of the lectures there…it goes in his pocket. How do you like dem apples?
But hey, look at it this way guys, at least you don’t pay as much as the Ismailis or the Qadianis right!? Heck, your Ahlul Sunnah wal Jamaah (well some of you are the Jamaah!) so you get a ticket to Paradise and a discount!
I mean, the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasalam wouldn’t disapprove would he? What about Isa alayhi salam? Gee, I wonder how he made a living…oh well, I guess we’ll never know!
Khayr I understand your beef with the concept of involving cash, but this is not Islamic knowledge. Are we teaching you Qur’an? No.
MashaAllah, Hussain Abdul Sattar does something a lot of us can’t, more power to him. You see, we keep mixing Discover U and comparing it to things within Islam. It’s not an Islamic science.
Rather is a tool we use to motivate people in every aspect of life, not just spirituality. It’s permissible to use such tools as long as we are obeying the Sharia,
It’s actually brought about challenges for DU. One example would be Music. Discover U has achieved results without the use of theraputic music or anything of the likes.
We get commitment through many means, not just money. Heck, for some people, money is not a commitment. (Ie. millionaire) It just so happens that everyone has beef with this aspect of it.
What does that say about us and how much we value our money?
Was salaam.
If ya’ll want some good advice- listen to what br. ali posted.
Anyways Riza, i appreciate you not pulling out the bida-gun on me for the whole Bayyah-thing, and I get what you’re saying.
DiscoverU isn’t an islamic organization, BUT Discoveru IS an organization dedicated to helping people get to their goals, and this is just crazy old Usman Akhtar talking, but I just feel like helping people improving their lives, whether by education, health care, addiction, islamic knowledge, spirituality, or reaching their life goals should be something people don’t have to pay for. And by the way Al Maghrib is another issue, and it IS an Islamic organization for money, which is organized by the same Shaykh.
But that’s just a thought, and i don’t want to provoke an argument.
Anyways, alhamdulillah, I feel more comfortable about the whole money thing and DiscoverU/Al Maghrib. But just imagine if all of the DiscoverU material was given out for free, and distributed in masjids for free. Heck you could get the impassioned almaghribites to distribute it. Imagine the number of lives it could change when the boundary of money is taken away?
Also, Shaykh Muhammad AlSahreef should write a self-help book, i think his sister has, but he should too, and pretty much every almaghribite will buy a copy.
Khayr,
it’s all good in the hood, and I have no beef with Al Maghrib or DiscoverU, but my heart is with what Brother Ali has said.
Assalamuaalaykum,
So is DiscoverU a for profit or non-profit organization?
BismillahirRahmanirRahim
What Ali said rung true.
@RizaK
Surah Yasin, Ayat 21:
“Follow those who do not ask any fee of you and they are themselves rightly guided. “
Surah Yasin, Ayat 21:
“Follow those who do not ask any fee of you and they are themselves rightly guided. “
Sadaqa Allah!
Verily Allah speaks the truth!
(Surah Ale Imran: ayah 95)
I think there is a MAJOR confusion as to what life coaching is all about.
For starters, just a glimpse of what coaching is…what would the NY Giants be without their coach? Tom Coughlin (head coach) doesn’t teach them football. The players already know the game.
The coach knows the play book and knows what questions to ask and knows what to say specifically to get the team focused on the prize in order to propel the captain and the rest of the players to win the superbowl.
Similarly, brothers who’ve been through the DiscoverU Training (Riza and I) have been trained to be a coach, but in the game of life and the superbowl trophy is Jannah
A coach’s job in 30-40 mins will be to help you (the client) identify where you are currently in what ever aspect of life you want to work on (ibadah, health, wealth, family, etc), where you want to be, and map out your action plan to your desired outcome.
As human beings shaytan causes us to delete, distort and generalize things that come through our senses which ultimately lead us to not fulfill our goals and do things that are displeasing to Allah-swt.
Coaching, NLP, Business, etc – They’re all human sciences. Fiqh, Usool, Quran, etc – They’re all religious sciences. Lets not confuse the two. When you hire a consultant to address problems (whether it be business, marriage, marketing, cars, nutrition, etc) they don’t necessarily teach you anything. They ask strategic questions to elicit a specific response from the client which ultimately address the core problems (not the presumed problems in the front).
If you’re committed to getting into the best shape of your life in six-weeks, I can guarantee your best results would be if you hire a coach. Whether that coach be a fitness specific coach, or a life coach who’s been trained to lead from the back, than if you simply just joined a gym on your accord.
– —
If you’re SINCERELY interesting in learning more about how coaching can benefit you then you’re more than welcome to hit up either Riza (Riza.Lifecoach [at] gmail.com) or myself khanb [at] leechon.com with what ever questions you may have.
As they say, its best to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth
The confusion isn’t about what life coaching is, it’s about the bad comparison between what life coaching is and what a sufi tariqa is.
I thought Islam was a complete way of life that addressed everything? The Quran is your coach. Fiqh goes into Business.
If ya’ll want some good advice- listen to what br. Ali posted.
And Amir if you need a life coach, just call your parents. i know them, they are the best life coaches you have. forget discouver u…they just want to make money. your parents are free.
@sister – I am my own life coach. I wasn’t planning on taking discoverulife i was just sharing my thoughts.
besides, while AlBaraa is saying that DiscoverU is about human sciences, he himself is saying:
“shaytan causes us to delete, distort and generalize things that come through our senses which ultimately lead us to not fulfill our goals”
I didn’t know human sciences delved into dealing with shaitans impact on our lives.. sounds like a religious science to me.
Salaam alaykum everyone,
If you want to debate the merits and demerits of life coaching itself, then get into the discussion here, where people are offering their complaints about what they’ve encountered so far:
http://muslimbestlife.com/forums/showthread.php?tid=5&pid=24#pid24
Mr LotaEnterprises already tore them a new one, I would invite the DL coaches to get in there and present their side of the picture. If you guys provide sufficient material, I’ll post your responses, for and against, on the muslimbestlife blog, insha’Allah.
Siraaj
“in what ever aspect of life you want to work on (ibadah, health, wealth, family, etc), where you want to be, and map out your action plan to your desired outcome.”
this is one thing that many people take criticism with,and is perhaps something that actually lends legitimacy to MR’s original post.
the differentiation is made between secular/religious sciences, but by saying you are going to help someone with ibadah like that – i can’t help but say that it DOES sound a bit sufi-ish.
the fundamental lesson i have always been taught in regards to ibaadah is that its personal, private, and constantly a struggle. to call someone and say “please help me make a plan for fasting mondays and thursdays” sounds a lot like, “i’m so tired because i was up all night praying”
moreover, to have that ibaadah “check-in” does sound very tariqah-ish. it might not have the same types of innovations that certain wirds may have but it seems to be the same concept as a shaykh assigning you specific ibadat to do after you give him bay’ah.
lastly – i am mentioning these points because i hope that some of these criticisms might force a better discussion and some more transparency about the process.
“If you’re committed to getting into the best shape of your life in six-weeks, I can guarantee your best results would be if you hire a coach. Whether that coach be a fitness specific coach, or a life coach who’s been trained to lead from the back, than if you simply just joined a gym on your accord.”
i agree. but the difference is, with a fitness coach, you see him in shape, you see his qualifications, etc. in order to be a fitness coach he has gone through 4-6 years of school, specialized in the field.
how am i to believe that someone who took a 1 week class or 2 week class can suddenly help me with weight loss, finances, family, and ibadah?
moreover, how is a coach supposed to help me with something like family if he himself is not married?
BismillahirRahmanirRahim
@ Mr. Enterprises
“It might not have the same types of innovations that certain wirds may have”
Wirds come from the sunnah, pick up almost any hadith book and you will see the Prophet (S) saying say such and such, or repeating such and such is the best dhikr. Wirds are simply collections of those instructions.
For example:
Prophet (S)said: “I love repeating: subhan Allah, wa al-hamdu lillah, wa la ilaha illallah, wallahu akbar: “Glorified is Allah, and Praise be to Allah, and There is no God but Allah, and Allah is most Great,” more than all that the sun shines upon.” (Narrated by Muslim and Tirmidhi)
Abu Dharr reported that the Prophet said: “Shall I tell you the words that Allah loves the most?” I said: “Yes, tell me, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “The words dearest to Allah are: subhan Allah wa bi hamdihi “Glorified is Allah with all praise to Him.” (Narrated by Muslim and Tirmidhi)
bu Hurayra also reported that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said, “Renew your faith.” “How can we renew our faith?” they asked. The Prophet replied: “Say always: la ilaha illallah.” (Narrated by Ahmad)
Some wirds that are propagated in Pakistan are quite elaborate though.
If x is the number of La illaha’s, then follow it with 2X^2 times of Alhamdulilah and its derivative times x number of subhanallAhs, and all your wishes will come true.
yursil – if you stuck to what was in the ahadith, then there’s no problem. i have an issue with your “shaykh” that you give bay’ah to who gives you wirds that aren’t in the hadith INSTEAD of those that are in the hadith.
BismillahirRahmanirRahim
Can’t speak to unknown people in Pakistan, but mainstream Tarikats all follow the sunnah in the wird.
Did Life coaches exist in the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him)? What? A Salafi teacher doing a biddah? times have changed.
@ Salam,
one could argue that The Prophet Sallallahu Alayhi Wassalam was the best example of a “life coach”, and people would ask him for advice bout every aspect of life.
I also want to emphasize, that the comparison to sufism in this article makes complete sense because it is only comparing the structure. The cool thing about sufism is that you have someone who can guide you, and someone you can rely on if you get into problems, and someone who can help you progress in that path.
But arguably, in tassawuf a shaykh or a “coach” is someone you need a lot more than in other less important aspects of your life, like health, wealth, etc, because developing yourself spiritually is not an easy thing, and requires someone with experience in it, and someone to help you when you’re not getting where you want to go, and someone to take you to the next level, when you have succeeded on a previous level.
“how am i to believe that someone who took a 1 week class or 2 week class can suddenly help me with weight loss, finances, family, and ibadah?
moreover, how is a coach supposed to help me with something like family if he himself is not married?”
@ Lota,
It’s a matter of leading from the back vs. leading from the front.
In a situtation of helping you with family when the coach himself isn’t married…
If that coach is is leading from the FRONT, he will not be able to help with any specific advice b/c the journey that specific coach has taken isn’t necessarily the journey you wish to take, therefor if they pull you in a specific direction, you will resist and ultimately get annoyed and possibly dislike the individual that is pulling you.
A coach who is leading from the BACK, will not tell you what to do or even pull you in any specific direction. — – This person will push you from behind by calling your bluffs and help you remove the mental obstacles you have in front of you, help you figure out the root of your issue(s), help you reframe certain perspectives by asking very strategic questions.
The coach leading from the back doesn’t have to necessarily have to be where the client wants to be in terms of goals, rather the coach should be able to understands the clients language. Whether they’re speaking from a language of success or a language of failure.
The coach’s job is to pay attention to the client and be acutely attentive to what they’re saying and from that move them to physiology and psychology of excellence which ultimately lead the client to move towards positive action, which ultimately move them towards their goals and objective…
…this is the major difference b/w leading from the back vs leading from the front.
Listening to advice, lectures, books, experts, etc – (aka leading from the front) – will not change anything b/c the person themself (client) will have to want to move in a specific direction before they’re open to accepting any sort of information.
As coaches, we’re not giving you advice, lecture, etc. We’re getting you focused on your your dreams by asking you strategic questions that will make you aware of whether or not your dreams are ultimately connected to Allah-swt.
Ultimately, coaching isn’t gaining of information – its simply an experience of empowerment and results conditioning that’s designed to pump your balanced life to a level you would never have been able to do on your own in such a dramatic way and in such short amount of time.
–
My question to you is, what are your dreams and how can I best support you in getting there?
Assalam ‘alaykum,
Trying to avoid to make a real comment but just a clarification. To the best of my knowledge – the Shadhilteachings site that hosts the durus of Shaykh Nuh originally did not charge. However, over the years due to sheer volume in terms of bandwith – the maintainer of the site (Sidi Hamid I believe) had to charge to maintain it.
Sidi Dawud summed up tasawwuf pretty simply (whether or not he noticed) – from Surah Yasin. The key is they are rightly guided themselves. A Kafir can be a lifecoach if he goes through the training program but a Sufi, a Sufi is something else entirely – someone who Allah has enraptured in His mercy and guidance and made a source of guidance.
If I made any mistakes or offended anyone my apologies.
wallahu a’lam, wa hasbiyahu wa ni’ma l-wakil
du’as
yaser
@Usman
Did the Prophet (peace be upon him) charge money for his advice?
@Salam,
Did the Prophet (SAW)’s drive cars?
man, muslims really like to fight things out.
It was an interesting article, i “get” the analogy.
However, some of the comments about coaching are baseless.
don’t get offended by it because nobody wants to offend you, and make dua that those who like it benefit from it.
interesting discussion nonetheless,
Nahyan
ps. I am a DiscoveU LifeCoach so that makes me a bit biased i guess
@Salam
No.
@Nihal Khan
No.
I hope you don’t think that means that if the Prophet (SAW) could drive he would have been charging money for advice.
There’s another discussion on the merits of “life-coaching”, whether its “advice” or not, and more is being discussed here. Check it out:
http://muslimbestlife.com/forums/showthread.php?tid=5&pid=24
@ Salam
If you’ve actually took the time to read any of my previous comments then you wouldn’t be so quick to comment.
DiscoverULife is an organization just as AlMaghrib, Zaytuna, and SunniPath are. Would it be right to critizise these institutes because they charge money? Society has changed. If an organization doesn’t get money than how does it plan to run?
That is by far the most twisted comparison based on that jumbled pile of spaghetti aqeedah in your head. No! Don’t try to match the different noddles together and say it starts from here and end there. No… seriously. Stick to your bhangras and chanting but don’t try to compare because you’ll sound like an infomercial sales man pitching the differences and similarities to stupid buyers like us.
There are very sensible comments posted here and some very irrational ones. I am not familiar with the organizations being blasted here, but I am planning to setup my own life-coaching business in the near future. I have worked in mental health for 11 yrs and presently provide in-Home services to those classified as severely mentally ill. Even though I work for a non-profit organization, the cost of such services is staggering. Fortunately, for most clients, the money is paid by taxpayers and insurance rather than the clients directly – most of whom are receiving social security benefits. I am very successful in helping my clients to recover; my approach is essentially life coaching, though I can legally provide, counseling, case management, and med supervision. I spent over 20 hrs last week assisting clients in their daily living skills – both verbally and physically; I provided very crisis counseling to a suicidal client. I have Christian, Atheist, Jewish, and clients of other belief systems. I have also worked with Muslims who were in the mental health system, as well. I see many Muslims in the mental health system that needs guidance but also crisis intervention to help them get their lives back on track. Though I will have a degree in Behavioral Health/Psychology in less than a yr, my conceptual framework is holistic, and I intend to offer Holistic Life -Coaching and Positive Psychology services to the public.
I also intend to be a referral source and I will utilize the services of qualified Imams, Shaykhs and Muslim physicians, in cases where their expertise is appropriate.
All professional services cost money, as they require time and investment of the service providers. I worked 65 hrs last week, including assignments with in-home, community housing, and long-term residential clients. It cost me time, energy, money, and wear and tear on my vehicle. Many of the comments posted here are very unfair and uninformed. Perhaps, it was a mistake to compare life coaching to Tariqah. I have found that most Imams and Shaykh offer counseling to believers when they experience crisis. Life Coaching is not counseling, per se. Rarely do the Imams and Shaykhs do the kind of systematic work that a trained Life-Coach does; I do not believe that most know how. Life-coaching is not quoting books and telling a person what they should or must do; it is objective and non-judgmental; sometimes I have to make non-Muslims feel comfortable with working with me, by alleviating their fears about Muslims in general and that I will not really help them because of their religion. For my In-Home clients, I am given access into the most private part of their homes and their lives.
Life Coaching is work – professional work! I do not know of any profession where one is expected to work full-time without compensation. Many Muslim organizations even charge for dawah pamphlets and classes. I know Arabic teachers who charge for their services; should they teach free. There is a difference in the quality of services or instructions offered at no cost and those that require investment by the recipient. Of course, some services have to be free because there are those who cannot afford them. I often pick up free food boxes for some of my clients; there is noticeable difference in the quality of that food and that of the food offered in grocery stores at regular prices.
In my conclusion, I say, if a person simply needs dawah, give it to him or her for no charge or refer them to someone who will. Stop comparing professions to Islam. I am cognizant, as I am sure that you are, of the reality that true spirituality is holistic and an approach cannot be called holistic if it divorces itself from spirituality. True spirituality is, in fact, Islam. Please, brother and sister coaches, do not take advantage of believers for the sake of dunya -tokens. To all: do not make things haram that Allah has not forbidden, including foods, clothing, past-times, and professions…. Do not try to make yourself an authority in a field in which you do not have adequate knowledge.
Allah Hafiz!
interesting comments. wow some people are funny.